My father drove in from Des Moines to help me with my son. He showed up Sunday evening, he's leaving in a few hours, and it hasn't been a long enough visit. My stepfather is in the hospital. Last Thursday he had heart surgery, and now they're not letting him go home. They want him to be under constant care for a while.
I feel so helpless. I can't go and support my mother while she waits for her husband. In the past, I'd always be right there by her side to help. When my stepfather had his first heart attack I spent countless days in the hospital, and when my grandfather had medical issues I flew to Florida to spend a week at his bedside. Now... now I can't get out. Last nights venture has caused a great deal of increased pain today.
Cold weather is hell.
I feel like I'm falling behind on my writing. Maybe I'll feel caught up tomorrow...
I am still bitter about not being able to be a pall bearer at my Grandmothers funeral. It is damnable how our trials change our ability while changing us so little.
ReplyDeleteOh, God. I hadn't even thought about that...
ReplyDeleteKevin you went through that. You couldn't even attend let alone be a pall bearer at your grandfather's funeral because of your RSD. :( (which in turn prevented me and Lincoln from going too) This pain not only takes away the ability to do pleasnat/fun things, but also the ability to do unpleasant necessary sad things, like attending funerals. People complain and don't want to do the unpleasant/sad things in life and here you are wishing you could and would give everything to do them. People take for granted both the good and bad in their lives.
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