I'm having a rough day today...
Currently, I have a room that is set up to be my safe haven. It was put together to offer me a certain level of comfort while affording me the maximum opportunity to work on my writing, art, and music. During the evening hours I enjoy hosting my wife and child in the room. We watch television, play video games, chat, etc. But it seems as if my safe haven is being left in greater disarray with each morning I wake. Some mornings are better than others, and I'm not too terribly upset about it. I understand that my wife comes home from long days in the office and just wants to unwind, and let's face it, picking up after a 3 year old is not relaxing.
My wife and I have already had a long discussion about the topic, and she was very understanding. Amy never ceases to amaze me in her ability to hear what I'm saying.
So, back to my bad day...
This morning my little monster woke up early and joined me in my room to watch children's shows. All morning he was trying to poke my feat, and, on more than one occasion, he caused me a great deal of pain. This was followed up by my mother's desire to protect her investment in her window trimming.
Throughout the evening hours a large amount of moisture collects at the base of the windows and causes warping and mold growth on the wood trimming. Every morning she comes in to wipe down the trimming and, some days, to remove the trimming to clean. Today, while she was going through her routine, she moved a can of soda onto the swivel portion of my desk. With all the drugs I'm on, and my lack of solid sleep, I tilted the desktop and poured soda all over my keyboard, trackpad, floor, etc. I was devastated.
At some point my son had decided that he wanted to play one of his games which he could not locate. I had assumed that he had moved it somewhere and couldn't remember where he had placed it. I found the racing game along the chair my wife likes to sit in while she's immersed in her social networking. She had set it on her table and somehow it fell off.
So my morning hours have been invested in cleaning, picking up left overs from last night, and walking round the house trying to find a copy of "Sonic All-Stars Racing". I'm exhausted, in a grand amount of pain, and in a funk.
For those of you reading who have a loved one that suffers with chronic pain or RSD, please realize that the more ordered their environment is, the less pain they have to suffer, and the more productive they can be.
On another note; I received a letter from the judge that will be overseeing my social security hearing. It was addressed to the apartment we had been evicted from. I had informed my attorney of the eviction on multiple occasions, and had given them the new address, but it seems that they didn't take the time to inform the department of human services... I suppose I'll have to call them at some point today.
I'm sure that my VA claim is being held up because the North Chicago radiology department hasn't called me back to set up the appointment. I think I'll be talking sternly to them soon here...
Sorry this entry has been a bit of a downer, but I think the messages it sends had to be written out.
Thank you all for taking the time to read,
K.M. Shear
There is more room out here than there is inide you, Kevin. Rant all you need to! Purge on the "paper" I'm sure there is comfort in it even if it doesn't solve anything-it really doesn't need to. Sending love, hugs, prayers and anything good to you I can.
ReplyDeleteRant on, it is only going to help.<3 Prayers to you and yours as always.
ReplyDeleteI have made my room a room for me only - I will allow others into it as long as they keep relatively quiet and stay on the couch. I don't play video games so there is not that distraction for anyone - nor is there a television in there. Although I have thought to put one in there to have the Comcast classical or Jazz music stations on for the variety. But my wife talks me out of it knowing that it would become a distraction and the iPod works well - also I can get music stations on the laptop. The room is always orderly, and I've two guitars in there but have considered taking them out to empty the room a little more.
ReplyDeleteThis is where I write, this is where I think, this is where I sometimes take naps, this is where I can silently weep or go insane without the additional stressors of other voices that aren't already in my head.
BTW - if there is condensation forming on the window sills or windows or the area around - there is an insulation problem - probably a lack of proper insulation which can be corrected with a small hole in the wall and liquid insulation injected in - not too costly - the other problem could be that the windows weren't properly installed and that is another issue entirely in which the contractor should be sued - needless to point out - it is problem that can be fixed and if there is condensation on the outside - there is condensation on the inside which breeds mold, and a lot of it.